Live life with H.E.A.R.T! A=Appreciation (Mac 14, 2010)
After exploring the E= Encouragement, we shall move on to A=Appreciation. My understanding towards appreciation is simple. To me, appreciation is a simple gesture. It does not take much time and efforts to appreciate others. The key is to make it a way of living, not merely as a tool to pull out when it seems convenient. Next, communicate it in a way that it is heard.
I always feel that to appreciate, we do not have to wait until everything is done or completed. To appreciate, we need not have to wait until we get it all perfect or to wait until people have done things exactly as we had wanted them to. We can start appreciating life, appreciating others and ourselves exactly as we are, right now.
I believe that, when our hearts are truly thankful, it will come out of our mouth and be evident in our words and in our lives. We will not find fault, instead, we will find something to praise. We will not complain, but rather, we will rejoice.
With an appreciative and thankful heart, we will not focus on what is lacking; we will be filled with all that is good. We will not be resentful because we feel cheated; we will cherish and acknowledge how much we are blessed. The way we live, our attitude and our perspective are communicating something to others at all time.
Perhaps it is good to think and ponder on the relationship that we are in. Do we recall that our partner or friends are always there for us when we need advice and guidance? Do you recall all the wonderful memories we have shared over the years? As for me, I have a few close friends who are always by my side, be it moment of happiness or sorrow. I appreciate what they have done for me. One of them is my very loving godmother, Grace Yong. She is the principal of a tuition centre in Kuching. We have known each other for nearly six years. I always receive her encouraging messages through sms, cards and conversation. She is so kind in providing me the comfort. When I am sick, she will boil herbal tea and send it to my office. To make it hassle free, she even brings along a paper cup. I am always touched by her kind and genuine gesture of love and care. I love her for who she is. I would like to take this opportunity to thank her, thanks for her kindness and thoughtfulness. Her messages warm my heart whenever I travel abroad. I wish to thank her for everything that she has done for me.
Again, let us think about how lovely it feels to have a hug from someone whom we have known and shared our life experience. There are so many people who do not have anyone in their life to share their moments of joy or sadness with and to have the pleasure of a warm embrace.
If we feel we are genuinely being valued and appreciated, we will extend ourselves to whosoever is showing us this appreciation. When we communicate our appreciation effectively, it is a win-win situation for all. However, very often we neglect this fundament to establish healthy and growing relationships.
We cannot fake appreciation. It must come from our heart. If we are not truly appreciative when acknowledging another person, it manifests itself as insincerity. People can notice the difference between sincere and insincere appreciation.
Sometimes, as a way to value those who are close to us, we may have to be accommodative. Look at the larger picture; how have they contributed to our success, joy or well-being? Take whatever time is required to view through the lens of reality, to gain a clear perspective and viewpoints about how they have been of great blessings to us.
We can be assured that our appreciation and gratitude is being heard when our life becomes a song of praise—-realizing the many blessings which we do deserve. Life is a gift. The love we share with others is priceless, and the beauty and wonders of creation we see and experience is a privilege by the grace of the Creator.
How do we learn to appreciate things and people around us? The first thing to do is to appreciate ourselves. I tell myself that:
- I appreciate and believe that by allowing myself to move through the greatest challenge and pain, I am able to experience the deepest joy right on the other side.
- I appreciate failures, learn from them and see them all as blessings in disguise.
- I appreciate that I do not always get what I ask for, but I always get what I really need.
- I appreciate that I am a writer and that it has taken me a lifetime to be able to say that and really mean it.
- I appreciate my judgment and sense of style, love for beautiful things and my ability to take the ordinary and make it extraordinary.
- I appreciate my ability to recognize the Angels in my life. They are those who love me.
- I appreciate my very strong will. It makes me determined enough to prove to those people, who have told me that something cannot be done, that they are wrong.
This is how I learn to appreciate myself. When we begin to appreciate and value ourselves, we are already on our way to appreciate others. Let us celebrate who we are, what we do, and the many gifts and talents we have. Self-appreciation is not arrogance. It's an awareness of your own power and it's the key to self-confidence, success, and fulfillment.
There's a saying, "Argue for your limitations and they are yours." Let us instead learn to appreciate and celebrate all the good stuff in others, around us, and in ourselves. When we focus on this good stuff, our world is transformed and we are able to see and experience the GREAT FULLNESS of our lives and we will begin to appreciate our family, our co-workers, our organisation, our city and later our country and the world.
I shall proceed in introducing the letter R in the acronym of H.E.A.R.T. It stands for “Reach out”. Let us explore together the words “Reach Out” in my next Sunday Column.
Esther Law is a director, consultant, trainer, Past Division Governor of Toastmasters International, President for Lions Club of Kuching Host (2009-2010). Esther is also the Overseas Director of Fuda Cancer Hospital, Guangzhou, China. If you have any comments about this article you can contact her at lawleepoh@gmail.com
